an ode to Penn State boy

2005 was perhaps the shittiest and yet oddly best year for me. in terms of loss? huge. in terms of growth? huge. in terms of alcohol consumption? absolutely freaking ginormous.

this was the year that I spent serial "dating", and man is that something that I don't miss. I put it in parenthesis because I never got past 2 or 3 dates with any of the men I went out with. the one that I did like evidently didn't like me, because he never called me back after our first date (but he spent the next 6 months stalking me online, weirdo), one that I kind of like wouldn't pay for my eggs, and the rest of them were more amusing than date-able. but it was a fun time, I will admit that.

one of these young men went to Penn State. We spent an exceptionally long time talking rather than dating, because I had started a rough semester of grad school and was uber busy and he was somewhat antisocial and didn't know how dating actually worked. he ended up actually being fairly cute, if not a bit overly high-strung, but thing just... well, they didn't work out for us, mostly because of our first meeting.

the year that we met each other happened to be a year when Michigan was having a bad season, and Penn State was having an exceptional one. They were undefeated and we had already lost two or so games that season, so the annual meeting was highly anticipated between the two of us.

this year I watched the Penn State game from the couch in my apartment. with beer in hand? yes. but only one beer. doesn't hold up to that hilarious day in October two years ago, that's for sure, and I'm kind of more than glad. It's kind of nice to think that my days of drinking ridiculously excessively (next weekend excluded) and carousing for men (next weekend... KIDDING, DICE!) are over.

in honor of Penn State boy, who I'm sure is once again mourning his teams loss on this eve of their ninth straight loss to us, I give you this wonderful, wonderful story that I wrote on the crazychica blog (comments are also included at the end, because they are hilarious as well). one of many from that year of awesome and tragic times...

Monday, October 17, 2005
lasting impressions.

whose idea was it to meet up with some random guy that I've never met before when I was TOTALLY HAMMERED???

worst. idea. ever.

sorry, I'll be a little less ambiguous now that I'm not on my way to a meeting. first of all, I'd like to announce that I've made a triumphant return to drinking after a 4 week dry spell. Now that I'm not training for anything I can drink again. yay! bad news: my tolerance is shot. unreal.

Anyways, so theroommate, Mo and I went out to watch the UM v. PSU game at our favorite local establishment. We opted for the non-smoking section, which was a mistake because that's where the "families" sit, I guess. Mo is stuck in traffic, so I am half way into my second 22 ozs. of Blue Moon before she gets there. This on an empty stomach = bad news. We order burgers and drink more beer. Life is good. Michigan scores their first 3 points slightly before the half, and it is suggested that we order shots after each time we score. heh. you see where this is going.

before the game, one of the guys i've been talking with (who happens to be a PSU alum) had been text messaging me and then eventually started calling because he was too drunk to text message me anymore. classic, right? He even handed his phone off to one of his friends, who proceeded to call me a bitch, but whatever. I think I said something like, "So, are you ready to lose today?" or something like that, so I guess I in some way deserved it, but it was still kind of harsh. anyways, this friend thinks it's a good idea if we hang out after the game. I don't think this is such a good idea, because I knew I'd be drunk, but I think I kept this to myself.

fast forward to the second half. I am drunk text messaging, and eventually stop getting a response because, well, I'm being obnoxious and all. I think I asked, "what the fuck is a nittany lion anyways?" and then responded, "that's the gayest mascot ever." to his response. I am ridiculously intoxicated. I am running around the bar high fiving everyone who remotely looks like a Michigan fan. it's great, right? Adults are sheltering their children from me because I'm yelling "fuck" excessively. life, in general, is good.

Mo drives us home with a stop at the store for pizza rolls for good measure. I honestly do not remember the next few hours. Evidently we called Lepech, who seemed to be amused by our drunkeness, if I remember correctly, and many, many other people. I don't remember what happened, but I recall talking to the PSU alum as he was heading back. He passed the phone to his friend's girlfriend who I proceeded to have a conversation with. I believe I said something along the lines of "we girl engineers need to stick together" (because she is an engineer, natch) about 50 times. Nevermind that I am not actually an engineer. heh.

I recall waking up and Mo, theroommate and I were all passed out on my bed. Then I remember yelling at Mo to help me find my iTunes giftcard that I had put in my nightstand. All I know is that the next day I was wondering why every item in my nightstand had been tossed all over the place. hilarious. then Mo passed out on the couch and theroommate passed out in her bed. I called Jeromiah and he was basically making fun of me. He even WARNED me that it was a bad idea to go meet this guy.

Anyways, fast forward to 11:00. I get a phone call from the guy telling me he's at the bar and where are we? I tell him we're all passed out at my apartment, naturally. He seems irritated. I tell him we'll meet him there. An hour later, we finally show up. I kind of forget that we are meeting someone because by the time we get our drinks I become distracted by the super hot bass player. I check my phone 30 minutes later and I have 3 missed phone calls. I text him back and we wander around, trying to find them. We finally see two guys staring at a phone in the middle of a bar and assume it's them. It is them, and they don't seem amused. General awkwardness ensues because, well, we don't really KNOW these people and they are irritated with my drunkeness to begin with. They leave and we continue to enjoy the band, but needless to say I don't think we're going to be hanging out too much.

Moral of story: Do not have your first meeting with someone coincide with one of your most drunken nights ever. Sadly, I kind of really think it's hilarious. And well, if he can't handle me drunk then oh well, right?

posted by mouse @ 12:32 PM


9 Comments:

skitzo said...

who did you meet up with? Swimmer? the boy who calls to much?
2:32 PM


mouse said...

It's the guy who calls excessively. Actually, I think he figured things out and wasn't calling nearly as much, but whatever. Doesn't matter much now, eh?!
5:22 PM


skitzo said...

well if he can't handle you drunk then you may as well forget it...was he cute?? Oh well, stupid drunken nights happen all the time;)
6:32 PM


mouse said...

honestly, I don't remember. Mo, help me out on this one, eh??

theroommate just informed me that I talked to one of her friends (Jason, Mo) for a REALLY long time. I don't recall this AT ALL.
7:16 PM


MplsJu said...

haha, you also called me after the game and we had a conversation...which was repeated when you called me again an hour later. ha!
8:03 PM


mouse said...

Ju, I totally don't remember calling you after the game. oh my lord. that's hilarious.

I just talked to Jeromiah and he said, "man were you grumpy." huh? I so don't remember being grumpy, but whatever.
9:45 PM


zajak said...

man, you are fabulous. i wish you were closer, if you weren't a michigan fan. but i could even get past that, i suppose. i need people that fun here. anyway, thanks for making a girl-who-is-miserable-about-working-her-ass-off-way-too-much-and-doing-a-pretty-shitty-job-at-it laugh out loud for a change.

he calls way too much, and clearly doesn't understand the importance of a drunk-football-filled afternoon. so screw him.

someone-fond-of-hyphens-tonight,
emily
10:29 PM


mo said...

I can't recall ever seeing mouse quite this drunk before or should I say "fucking hammered". And it lasted for hours. Even a nap didn't calm it down:) Mouse talked to Jason a couple of times I believe (during which time theroommate kept saying, "I miss Jason so much."), callingboy like 101 times before we actually met him and her conversation with Ju was hilarious. Especially the second time since it was the exact same (at least mouse's end). I think mouse may have actually had the same conversation with everyone she talked to that night. "Did we really win the game?", "I can't fucking believe it!", "It's great...to be...a Michigan Wolverine!". Sound familiar to anyone? And the whole time theroommate is saying, "I love this. I have never seen you this drunk before." Then there is me, the mostly sober person, trying to get her to stop shouting fuck when there were 10 year old children at the next table:) I was unsuccessful, but I think the children learned the proper way to take tequila shots by watching all of us!

The boy we met later at the bar (calls excessively) was cute, but he seemed to be really nervous or maybe just shy. Theroommate and I both thought his younger brother was cuter. We talked to them for maybe 1/2 an hour and then they had to go. It wasn't the ideal situation to meet someone for the first time. But if he couldn't handle it then he's a waste of time because mouse isn't much different when she's sober:) I have to give him props for taking a shot of tequila like a real man though.

What happened to watching Monday Night Football?

Ju -did D$ get our message?
11:44 PM


mouse said...

wait... we left D$ a message on Saturday? I left him one last night because we're going to be in Columbus on Saturday (Ju, do you know where we should go to watch the game, where we won't get killed for wearing UM stuff?) but I don't remember leaving one saturday.

Em, this TOTALLY rivaled me running on the treadmill in Frey's basement without pants on and his dad coming down stairs. ha! good grief.

Oh, he totally bailed on watching MNF (that's when we were SUPPOSED to meet) but at least he was polite about it. hilarious!
10:23 AM